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but no regrets (yet...) because it has been fun just hanging out and getting drunk and having fun...although i didnt get to do the things that would have made the nights funner. the way im writing right now makes me think about which particular neurons died...maybe the ones that had something to do with writing coherent sentences...ill get back to you on that one. i am looking forward to the next detox week, hoping the next time, i wont just get drunk, ill also get to take advantage of that state to make someone admit (even only thru his actions) tha he has feelings for me too. i think thats ultimately the reason why its ok for me to keep on killing my brain cells. just so for one night, i could feel cared for and be affectionate to someone i would never consider touching (for fear he'd know i like him) when sober. toast to that.
although, i think its not really alcohol i need. I need guts. |
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